Everybody gets a strange creature: legs, stilts, tentacles, flippers, maybe a neck. You name the next person's. Then you record two noises into your phone: its footstep and its falling-over noise.
On your phone, every limb is a column of 16 steps, in the color of its sock. Tap a step and that limb pushes on that beat; on the empty ones it lifts and swings forward. Drag to fill a bunch.
LIFT (one per limb): how high it picks that foot up. TEMPO: how fast it goes through the steps. PUSH: how hard the muscles work (strong is fast, and also how you end up upside down).
Your creature walks the next course right there on your phone, with your noises, while you edit. HR has suggestions if you're stuck. CLOCK IN when it's ready.
Everybody in their own lane, to the loading dock. Up to 45 seconds. Fall over and Facilities flips you back (a "pivot"). Stuck? A nudge. Points for distance, place and getting to the dock.
Peer recognition: vote for the best walk (not the fastest). Reviews: last place goes on a PIP. Restructuring: every creature mutates, and the PIP gets to choose. Then a new course.
Your new employee will be issued shortly. You'll name a coworker's, record some noises, then teach yours to walk.
It has never walked. That's your job now. Somebody else is about to name it.
It goes on the TV, over your employee. It doesn't help.
Not the fastest. The best. Watch the TV. You can't vote for your own.